Sometimes I feel that my world is moving too quickly. I struggle to catch up. Between work, hobby-job, Becca’s care and teaching, errands to run, housework to do, it’s like the plate stands keep getting higher and higher and are spinning faster and faster. I’m sure one of these days they will just all come crashing down. And they did.
Last week I got the stomach bug. I was down and out. Wednesday I had to have Cody come back home from work to take care of Becca because I was so weak from the deluge out both ends that I could barely lift her, much less entertain her. I actually made her a bottle, dumped a bunch of puffs on the floor in her room, called that breakfast, and prayed for him to drive fast. I ended up taking some anti-nausea meds that made me sleep all day, and felt better enough for him to go back to work on Thursday.
This is trademark in my life. When I get so busy that God just has to do something to get my attention, He does it. He knocks me upside the head and says “BE STILL and know that I am God!” So then what do I do? I recover and start to fill in the gaps of everything I missed while I was sick. Did I learn the lesson? This time, I believe I did. Through my Bible study time this morning He has spoken.
I’ve started a fabulous book by Joanna Weaver called “Having a Mary Heart in a Martha World.” God is using it to transform my heart and to realize that having a good relationship with Him is not about making sure that the house is perfect, the table linens match, the dishes are spotless, and the food is 5star, nor worrying if the sheets are fresh and the bathrooms clean. It’s about knowing when to STOP and just sit at His feet and listen to what He has to say. I love how she puts it: “Because we are his children, Kitchen Service will be the natural result of Living Room Intimacy with God. Like Jesus, we must be about our Father’s business. The closer we draw to the heart of the Father, the more we see his heart for the world. And so we serve, we minister, we love, knowing that when we do it to ‘the least of these,’ we have done it unto Christ.”
Somehow, in all my busy-ness, the time flew by me. I missed it. I blinked. No, more like I booked travel, called clients, met with clients, did mountains of laundry, made dozens of cards, did hundreds of loads of dishes, vaccummed countless times, changed millions of diapers… Size Newborn, size one, size two, size three, size four, size five, night time pullups size 3t-4t. And I missed it. Oh, I was there. I have millions of pictures to prove it. But I feel like I missed it. One more day. Just one. That’s it. Just one more day and this girl will be eleven months old. ELEVEN!!! Holy crap!!! I think God smacked me just in time. Now- how do I make today the BEST day with my girl? How do I make today last forever? How do I turn a trip to the post office, dropping off stuff to a friend, and picking up a couple items at HEB into the BEST day in her little 10 month and 29 day old life? We’ll find out. God has a plan.
And I’m pretty sure it doesn’t involve me freaking out because her birthday party is one month from tomorrow and I have a million things to do!!